Valentine's Day

What are you getting, spray cream and cucumbers?

 

The mind boggles....

 

I might get the wife a cucumber and film the reaction I get.

Rusty

 

Make sure you monetise the video first

 

I think it would probably end up being a video nasty. And I dare not think where she put the cucumber after she has unwrapped it of course.

Rusty

 

Rusty`, you are advised to also buy a tube of K Y Jelly also.lol

 

Hang on, I think I've worked it out.....You peel and slice the cucumber, season the cream carefully with salt and pepper and make a nice, refreshing salad for two.. At least that's what they'd do here.. Nutella now, that's another story...

 

I think I might just buy half a cucumber, otherwise I may turn into Clarence the cross eyed lion .

Rusty

 

Several years ago, our local hotel offered Valentine's Day specials with evening meals, Champagne and overnight accommodation. They also had a special offer reduced rate for additional guests sharing the same room!

 

Was that the Oasis?

The Oasis Hotel (Harlow) - Reviews, Photos & Price Comparison - TripAdvisor

 

I read a few of the reviews. Truly excellent reading. The place sounds fantastic. I particularly enjoyed the bit about the receptionist bursting into someone's room at midnight, the bloke that had to listen to the neighbours having sex til 3 am, and the person whose room filled up with smoke because there were holes in the floor and the kitchen was directly below.

I think the place should be called The Mended Drum.

 

The day I met t'other half (Christmas Day 1967) he squirted spray cream in my hair, down the back of my linen slacks and under my silk blouse ... and we are still married .. guess which I would choose?

I DO like cucumber sandwiches though .. but he doesn't!

I won't get anything for Dia dos Namorados though.

 

Husband and I stood at the card rack picking out cards for each other. I gave him one and he gave me one. then we put them back on the card rack.

 

They certainly need in sewer ants

When I stayed there, there was shouting and crying in Spanish about 8pm as a young family were rehoused in the room next to me, kids still in school uniform. They were ok in the morning as mum and dad were sat outside the room smoking marijuanna.

Surprised the lady that found the knickers and condoms in her bed didn't leave a review

Breakfast was served by a Russian shotput athelete who insisted on cooking me bacon/eggs as "it included" despite me trying to tell her/it that i'm vegetarian.

Got my room booked there on my way to this years Shineyland, taking my camera this time