Life's Regrets

These are such wonderful memories everyone is sharing..big 's to everyone...

Regrets I've had a few,too few to mention..(I know a song about that)

The two things that spring to mind (sounds really boring after seeing others) is not continuing to play the Cello and not carrying on playing Hockey for our region but that was back in the day..be hilarious to see me do it now..

As for true loves...I only have one..My lovely hubby..Yes everyone has ups and downs but true love see you though...We've been together now for 40 years (I know a song about that too) Married for coming up to 31 years on Monday...and it don't seem a day too long...

Lifes a funny old thing innit...

 

Hi,

Hindsight is wonderful isn't it.

I was engaged twice before I met Bron. The first was doubtful; she was gorgeous and deep down I realized I was in for trouble ahead; we parted when I passed her one day whilst out driving; she was hand in hand with another guy. This hurt me more than anything in my life has hurt me including fractures to my legs; I bumped into her maybe six years ago; she has been married and divorced twice. I still think of her but a lucky escape.

The second a lovely homely girl but my fault we split due to my ongoing feelings for the first girl who was still haunting me. This second girl married and divorced.

I suffered a serious road accident whilst riding my big motorcycle when a car hit me head on throwing me right over the car to bounce from a low garden wall fracturing my left knee cap and right ankle. I was at the lowest point in my life physically and mentally broken; I sought help from the jobcentre having closed my garage business and now out of work too.

It was suggested I attend the rehabilitation center in Leeds for assessment which I did; there I met a beautiful tall slim young lady who really looked out of place there; I travelled by car she travelled by train to the center; we used to meet each morning in the canteen and as I was about to trade my car in at an Huddersfield garage I offered her a lift home; we've been happily married for 43 years and I love my Bron to bits; in retirement I enjoy Bron's company and we are inseparable. My late parents and my family tried their best to prevent us marrying but we stuck together. Bron attended the center due to family illness that impacted on her; I was heartbroken when I split with my first fiance but I'm now very happy and content knowing I've got Bron by my side and that I can trust her with my life.

My parents passed away a few years ago leaving a detached bungalow; my two brothers and sister spirited away my inheritance and I finally divorced my family never ever wanting to see them again; Bron and I won't miss what we've never had and we don't live to be vultures waiting for people to die; my family of vultures will never know true happiness because of their greed and selfishness.

If we could put back time to when we married knowing what was to follow we'd have got well away to be on our own.

Kind regards, Colin.

 

I was in work one day and read an article called 'The top 5 regrets of the dying' - there is another thread on here which goes into more detail.

After reading the article, I wondered what the blue heck I was doing - so:

1 - contacted the pensions section to find out how much I would get if I retired at 55 and didn't pay in any more pension contributions - it was enough;
2 - made sure there were sufficient savings to get us through to 55 and then resigned, or as I like to call it retired;
3 - the look on my line managers face was a picture;
4 - sorted out home garden;
5 - have an entirely new circle of 'real' friends eg. through the allotment - I'm afraid to say, your so called friends in work are nothing of the kind. They are there for themselves only;
6 - I am now my 'true' self; no longer hiding behind a thin work veneer - we decide what we want to do, when we do it and for how long;
7 - now, I can't stand having to be somewhere at a particular time - as was the case for so long when I was a 'wage slave';
8 - I can't understand why people give up some much of their time to accumulating 'things' - you can't buy more time - no matter if we like it or not - our time is finite.

Regrets:

1 - I should have retired earlier (I was 52 when I did);
2 - I should have applied for an allotment far earlier.

 

Hi,

Well said clanless and so true.

I retired aged 53 from a hugely stressful job thinking I'd better walk out or I'll be carried out; nothing but hassle at work from going in to coming out; no peace even at break times because I had a pager; I used to hide in my car at dinnertime having sandwiches; in charge of three departments with five telephones made me wonder if I would have been better being stupid just turning up to do as little as possible each day then clock off and forget work until the next day on the shop floor?

I've now been retired 19 years without the slightest regret and am now 72. My boss at work passed away about a year ago he was aged 55; the amount of stress I was under at work didn't disappear when I left so someone was in for it. I was with the company for 24 years and paid a lot of money into their final salary pension; now in retirement with a number of pensions coming in Bron and I are far better of financially than ever we were whilst as slaves.

Just in the last few weeks three more of my work colleagues have passed away who worked very closely to me.

I too can't stand appointments and I never ever wear a watch or use a mobile phone; just leave me well alone to enjoy my retirement with my lovely Bron whilst ever we can. I take Bron out often and do my best to spoil her because she richly deserves it considering our past and how we've finally broken clear of slavery and family.

Life now is good and every day is an holiday for us.

Kind regards, Colin.

 

No regrets.....life is too short. I could say losing two babies, one son was lost in late pregnancy, but then we wouldn't have had our three amazing sons that have made our lives so very complete. There is always a silver lining , even to the heartbreaking events that life throws at us.

 

These are wise words:-

Every minute someone leaves this world behind.
We are all in “the line” without knowing it.
We never know how many people are before us.
We can not move to the back of the line.
We can not step out of the line.
We can not avoid the line.

So while we wait in line -

Make moments count.
Make priorities.
Make the time.
Make your gifts known.
Make a nobody feel like a somebody.
Make your voice heard.
Make the small things big.
Make someone smile.
Make the change.
Make love.
Make up.
Make peace.
Make sure to tell your people they are loved.
Make sure to have no regrets.
Make sure you are ready.

 

So lovely and sooo very true, thanks for your post @alana.

 

I regret losing the ability, overnight, to run competitively , due to sciatic nerve damage, at the age of 39.
I also regret the almost complete absence of love and affection from my life.

 

I've always felt that if i want things to change you've got to do something about it, it won't change by itself.

After my first divorce and having a young baby i was cut off from my friends and being able to go out and find someone else. So i joined a dating agency and found my lovely hubby. My mother was dead against it but i carried on. She told me to bring them in first so she could see who they were.

That was in the early 80s all done with sending letters.

 

It pays to go with your own heart and instincts. Hubs and I met 45 years ago when he was an overseas student studying for his PHD at our local Uni.
My parents had concerns, and now that I have children I can fully appreciate this, that his country and culture were very different from ours. When he went back home I planned to join him but there was a lot of unrest and political and religious turmoil developing that hit the headlines worldwide. The worry my parents must have had was awful.Thankfully hubs managed to leave on the only flight out and I received a telegram telling me he was waiting at Heathrow for me. Much to all our joy we were married 3mths later... and here we are 40 years later with 3 fabulous sons a beautiful 6 bedroom home that hubs designed and built from renovating a small farm workers cottage himself with the help of a builder friend. We had very little money at first as hubs found it very hard to get a job....only had to mention his nationality and people turned away. So he spent his time learning all about house design, house building and planning regulations. He never was and still isn't a builder by profession but when he sets his heart on something....
So I totally agree @Logan .....changes only happen if you yourself make them happen, life doesn't get served up ,nicely dressed up on a plate....you have to find your own menu!

 

Yours is a great love story @Upsydaisy thank you for sharing.

My in-laws were against me and my husband marrying. We only knew each for 4 months before we married and both sets of parents told us it would not last. We had no money, lived in rented accommodation and although we both had good jobs we had no savings. I think the opposition from both sides of our family made us determined to make our marriage work. We worked hard to save for our first home and although we struggled in the early days of our marriage we never asked for help from our parents. When our first child was born my parents and in laws were ecstatic (first grandchild) and all the warnings about our hastiness in marrying were forgotten.

Two more children, eight grandchildren and one great-grandchild later we are still together. We have a lovely home and garden and now retired we are still fit and able to enjoy our lives to the full. We've been blessed with a rich and colourful marriage, a close, loving family and the love we have for each other has given us the strength to overcome the lows and celebrate the highs.
Who said it wouldn't last ?- forty nine years and counting

 

That is so sad , but a situation I can certainly identify with, so you're not the only one.

 

I think @alana ,when the odds are against you it makes you more determined than ever to prove that other people's doubts are unfounded.
We are still waiting the arrival of grandchildren .....think our middle one will be the first, our other two and their girlfriends are too busy enjoying London life and shooting off abroad for long weekends! The middle one and his girlfriend are almost finished renovating their first home together...and I swear I heard the word nursery used to describe the smaller bedroom.