Daughter's Wedding?????

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by landimad, Apr 1, 2013.

  1. "M"

    "M" Total Gardener

    Joined:
    Aug 11, 2012
    Messages:
    18,607
    Location:
    The Garden of England
    Ratings:
    +31,885
    Ah, so she is concerned it won't "conflict" with 'anyone elses' ;) How could it? :dunno: No one else is her father! :)

    Speaking in public is not everyone's forte; that is a given! Speaking about one's child is a parent's known-known! ;)

    The first time I had to speak on stage, the very best advice I was given was this: don't look anyone in the eye (if you can't!), instead, focus on a point at the back of the room (a clock? a painting? A fly?). That is how you will get your first wind.

    Another important thing to remember is this: whatever comes out of your mouth will have the most impact on: your daughter, her new husband, your wife, the new "in-laws"; with that in mind (and if you can't find a clock/painting/fly) there are no rules which say you cannot simply look the important people in the eye as you deliver your words.

    And, what words should *those* be? Simple: from the heart! (Unless you really do not like the person she is marrying, in which case, it should be from tact and diplomacy! ;) :heehee: )

    You know your daughter's strengths; you know a funny story (or ten) about exhibiting those strengths; you know, in the bottom of your heart, what you most wish for her. You surely know by now, the kind of man she is marrying; praise his good points.

    Thank those who have contributed (bridesmaids, best man, etc., etc,)

    The main thing to remember is this: it doesn't have to take long to get your point across. One minute? Ten? Only you can judge; and only you *should* judge!

    Wishing you all the very best for Saturday. Smile; be polite; be sincere; but most of all - enjoy the experience!!
     
    • Like Like x 2
    • Freddy

      Freddy Miserable git, well known for it

      Joined:
      Jul 15, 2007
      Messages:
      9,466
      Gender:
      Male
      Occupation:
      Retired - yay!
      Location:
      Bristol
      Ratings:
      +12,517
      I have to say, that I find it somewhat controlling, to have the speech vetted first. Indeed, it kinda makes a speech pointless, imo
       
      • Agree Agree x 1
      • Folly Mon

        Folly Mon GC Official Counselor

        Joined:
        Dec 17, 2011
        Messages:
        1,805
        Gender:
        Male
        Occupation:
        starting new busniss in new year
        Location:
        House on the Hill
        Ratings:
        +2,409
        Thats a Proper Dad!!!! :wub2: You Say Exatley Wot Your Hart Desires to Say They Are All Famlie For the Day Merging as One

        The Classic is Im Glad Im Not Losing a Daughter but Gaining a Son In Law!!! Now Come n Help Me Cut the Grass Son

        Thats as Long as Ya Like Him :lunapic 130165696578242 5:You will be sound Enjoy and Saver the Moment
         
        • Like Like x 2
        • Funny Funny x 1
        • Sheal

          Sheal Total Gardener

          Joined:
          Feb 2, 2011
          Messages:
          35,986
          Gender:
          Female
          Location:
          Dingwall, Ross-shire
          Ratings:
          +53,905
          Don't try and learn the speech off by heart, but make yourself some notes to guide you through it. :)
           
        • Fidgetsmum

          Fidgetsmum Total Gardener

          Joined:
          Jul 25, 2009
          Messages:
          1,592
          Location:
          Deepest, darkest Kent
          Ratings:
          +865
          When our daughter got married, my husband steered well clear of all the 'mush' and sentimentality and his speech went along the lines of ....

          Weddings. Have you noticed it always her wedding, her reception, her dress, her trousseau, her flowers? For all the attention he gets, you could almost expect the poor groom to turn up in old PJs and wellies - although I have to say he's scrubbed up rather well today.

          There are, I've discovered in the last few months, a great many marriage traditions that even in the 21st century, must be adhered to. Apparently, as Father of the Bride I was expected to provide a dowry. According to one article I read, this dowry was traditionally a chest containing the personal possessions of the bride usually including clothes and accessories that she brings to the marital home to help establish the new home - although what [insert name of Groom] is going to do with [insert things like - 3 mobile 'phones, 2 pairs of pink fluffy slippers, 6 sets of hair straighteners, etc], and enough moisturiser and skin care lotions and potions to create an oil slick a mile wide and two long, is anyone's guess.

          Of course, it's not that one-sided. In many cultures the groom or his family, still pay a 'bride price', a payment given by or in behalf of a prospective husband to the bride's family. Now, it's not a tradition much used in this country, but since we were in the business of traditions, I thought this one worth reviving. Of course, such arrangements are usually private, but I'm sure [insert name of Groom's parents] won't mind my telling you, that as a consequence of this, my wife and I are now the proud owners of 3 camels, 2 water buffalo, a troop of colobus monkeys and a very affectionate boa constrictor.

          When they know your daughter is getting married, friends and colleagues are quick to tell you that you're not losing a daughter but rather gaining a son. Now, that is true of course, but what they don't tell you - and believe me I've googled this, and nowhere tells you - is that what you do lose is that healthy bank balance, your credit rating, the plans for the retirement world cruise or the right to make any decisions (particularly where weddings are concerned). On the positive side though, you do gain .. a bathroom, a spare bedroom and finally after 'x'-years [insert age of bride] of sharing cupboard space with female attire, somewhere to hang your own clothes.

          Oh, and he wrote two speeches - the one he showed our daughter and ..... the one he actually delivered!!
           
          • Like Like x 4
          • Funny Funny x 1
          • redstar

            redstar Total Gardener

            Joined:
            Aug 6, 2008
            Messages:
            7,385
            Gender:
            Female
            Occupation:
            Domestic Goddess
            Location:
            Chester County, PA, USA, Plant zone 4 & 5
            Ratings:
            +11,493
            You tell your red head, she is so dam lucky to have a dad to walk her down the aisle and to have a dad to pay for her wedding. I had neither. So say exactly what you wish.
             
            • Agree Agree x 3
            • landimad

              landimad Odd man rather than Land man

              Joined:
              Jan 23, 2012
              Messages:
              1,039
              Gender:
              Male
              Occupation:
              Retired Rail worker
              Location:
              Fenlands proper now
              Ratings:
              +915
              Many thanks for all your support guys, trouble is I cannot read some of this due to the restrictions placed on this and many other sites as I am at work. The Intranet is a closed server and will only allow some of the content to show and the rest is blocked. I shall try again when I get home, or when things quieten down after six pm.
               
              • Like Like x 1
              • landimad

                landimad Odd man rather than Land man

                Joined:
                Jan 23, 2012
                Messages:
                1,039
                Gender:
                Male
                Occupation:
                Retired Rail worker
                Location:
                Fenlands proper now
                Ratings:
                +915
                Well the straw that has broken the camels back has happened.
                We have 15 people turning up to stay over for the wedding and now we have lost our boiler due to parts not being available until next week.:mad:
                We have no hot water and little or no means of heating. Curse the gods of central heating.:wallbanging:
                 
                • Friendly Friendly x 1
                • Marley Farley

                  Marley Farley Affable Admin! Staff Member

                  Joined:
                  May 11, 2005
                  Messages:
                  30,588
                  Occupation:
                  Grandmother Gardener Councillor Homemaker
                  Location:
                  Under the Edge Zone 8b
                  Ratings:
                  +14,126
                  OMG you poor things that is just awful..!! Thinking of you all in your time of crisis.. :thud: I suppose de-camping to a local hotel isn't on the cards either, but they might take pity on your plight & offer you a deal.. ;)
                   
                • Jenny namaste

                  Jenny namaste Total Gardener

                  Joined:
                  Mar 11, 2012
                  Messages:
                  18,461
                  Gender:
                  Female
                  Occupation:
                  retired- blissfully retired......
                  Location:
                  Battle, East Sussex
                  Ratings:
                  +31,839
                  Jeez, that's horrendously bad luck Landimad. When a friend of ours had a major boiler failure, he rang all his family,friends and neighbours to beg, or borrow whatever they could spare by way of supplementary heating. If you were my neighbour, I wouldn't hesitate to lend you fan heater and a parafin heater from our garage. My thoughts are with you right now, good luck my friend,
                  Jenny
                   
                • nFrost

                  nFrost Head Gardener

                  Joined:
                  Feb 19, 2013
                  Messages:
                  1,763
                  Gender:
                  Male
                  Occupation:
                  Leachate Treatment Plant Manager
                  Location:
                  Cottingham, East Yorkshire
                  Ratings:
                  +2,908
                  What's up with the boiler Landimad? Have you tried http://www.partscenter.co.uk/ ? I know a little of boiler repair stuff.
                   
                  • Friendly Friendly x 1
                  • Lolimac

                    Lolimac Guest

                    Ratings:
                    +0
                    Blimey ....no wonder you're 'stressed'......sorry i can't give any constructive advice but i'd get the pans on and start boiling the kettle:grphg:....where abouts in the country are you?..... if your anywhere near East Yorkshire i could maybe help:dbgrtmb:
                     
                    • Like Like x 2
                    • Val..

                      Val.. Confessed snail lover

                      Joined:
                      Aug 2, 2010
                      Messages:
                      6,355
                      Gender:
                      Female
                      Occupation:
                      Retired
                      Location:
                      Hay-on-Wye, Hereford
                      Ratings:
                      +4,951
                      15 people staying over??? :thud: I hope you have a big house!! I feel so sorry for you, I do hope things get better, maybe they will all go to hotels instead!!

                      Val
                       
                    • redstar

                      redstar Total Gardener

                      Joined:
                      Aug 6, 2008
                      Messages:
                      7,385
                      Gender:
                      Female
                      Occupation:
                      Domestic Goddess
                      Location:
                      Chester County, PA, USA, Plant zone 4 & 5
                      Ratings:
                      +11,493
                      15 people.???? And your the father of the bride. And your wife the mother of the bride.
                      Sorry, but I truly think those 15 people are rude and insensitive and cheap. I would never think of imposing myself on a family who are getting ready for a wedding to be a guest in their house. I would be in a local hotel without even a second thought. Horrid.
                       
                      • Agree Agree x 6
                      • landimad

                        landimad Odd man rather than Land man

                        Joined:
                        Jan 23, 2012
                        Messages:
                        1,039
                        Gender:
                        Male
                        Occupation:
                        Retired Rail worker
                        Location:
                        Fenlands proper now
                        Ratings:
                        +915
                        Thanks nFrost, I am not so good with the repairs now, but its a combination of the thermistor and diverter valve which have lost me the hot water.

                        Redstar, the people who have stayed with us are not earning or are not big earners. I put them up out of the goodness of my heart to help out what would have been a poor show on my side of the family. Pensioners and young family with kids who do not have a penny to rub together have gone out their way to get here for a doo which was small yet in most ways family.

                        All,

                        For the most the day went really well and all had a great time, now for the aftermath of this. Kettles boiled, pans boiled and some of the neighbours are round with hot water and good wishes. We, that is Mrs landy and me would like to thank all for their support and best wishes for what in the most part a happy occasion. We have bin there seen it and now done it. Only three more to go then I can rest in the hope that financially I will have spent more than I have earned.:lunapic 130165696578242 5:
                        I have no axe to grind nor sword to swing as they have been sold to help pay for this.

                        :yay::ThankYou::partytime:
                         
                        • Like Like x 7
                        • Friendly Friendly x 1
                        Loading...

                        Share This Page

                        1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
                          By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
                          Dismiss Notice