How To Bathe A Cat

First you need a plastic milk crate. Since a lot of us happen to be cat lovers here, I will be glad to share how to give a cat a bath so you don't get all scratched up. First, liberally apply shampoo to the cat's back. Then drop cat in a clean toilet and quickly slam lid. Flush. Flush again. Don't worry about sounds coming from the toilet cat, he/she is actually enjoying this. Flush repeatedly several more times. Peek carefully through the crack between the toilet bowl and seat to see if all soap suds are gone. If still soapy, continue to flush, peek again. If satisfied, lift lid. ( be sure bathroom door is closed) Then quickly trap cat under the milk crate which confines the cat, making it much easier to blow dry him/her without fear of getting your arm torn off. Your cat should be making lots of deep growly noises, punctuated by shrieks of joy. When the cat's fur begins to smoke, it is dry. You may now open the bathroom door (failure to do so may result in torn wallpaper as he/she makes laps around the room trying desperately to find a way out so he/she can show off his/her clean shiny slightly singed fur). You may now lift the milk crate.

And this is how to bathe a cat!

 

I hope this is a sick joke. Not funny. It sounds cruel to me.

 

Cruel but amusing.. mind you, I once bathed a cat <--- as he had horse manure all over him, he actually let me get on with it with a few woeful meows, he knew he smelt bad! He soon scarpered outside to dry off though.. never again!

 

Saw it on bookface. except it ends, Signed, the dog.

It's a joke.

 

The only thing needed to bathe a cat is an ambulance waiting to take the person that tries it to ER...

Quite timely thread really, as this is the traditional day for eating cats in Sweden. We also wash them down with glue! They will even transmit a church service on TV about the event. How wonderful it is to live in a civilised country!

 

Enjoy!!

 

Relax, it is a joke. I had to bathe my cat and it was nothing like this! She actually took it rather well.