Slightly used Wife

Buys fresh veg & then leaves it to rot. Will open tins of beans rather than pick them from garden. Uses everything in the kitchen rather than do washing up, then uses plastic knives & forks instead. Buys every cleaning product Barry Scott has ever shouted at you, never cleans anything. Will buy tinned mackerell, even if we've got a freezer full of hand caught ones.Covers every available surface with bits of stuff, never sorts thru it or moves it ever again. Buys dusters, never dusts. Doesn't have a clue where all the recycling goes. Dustbin bags must leave the house by magic.
Puts washing in washing machine, doesn't have clue how it ends up dry & back in the right rooms. Will throw out your electric razor if you grow a beard for more than 3 weeks. Will choose decorating colours & then complain that it is wrong, hasn't realised that she is just as capable of opening paint & picking up a paint brush as everyone else.

Will trade for bottle of rum or similar.

 

Perhaps I'll swap for my husband who has similar 'qualities' ... :yez:

 

You got an Aquarius too then Victoria ?

 

My wife has read somewhere in a paper recently that people who are left-handed can have a variety of faults. It would appear that I have all of them.

She's never wrong and when she is, she's still "right."

 

No, Ziggy, he's a Leo but I'm a Taurus.

PS Meant to say I would swap because yours seems to have more 'qualities' than mine ... but after 42 years I am still doing 'training' so may get there in the end ..........

 

Lol, shes left handed too

 

According to my OH, it's no coincidence that we get the word 'sinister' from the Latin word for 'left' (sinestra). I'm a left-hander, by the way.

 

I'm sure all we lefties will agree that it's no disadvantage.
If there's anything we need to do with our right hand it isn't a problem.
I can use a saw, chisel, spanner, or hammer etc., with my right hand if necessary.
I actually eat my dinner "right-handed" because as a child, I got fed up with having to swap the cutlery around.

 

I eat right-handed too, Doghouse. Ziggy, for goodness sake buy the woman a dishwasher. Washing up is an evil job.

 

She would only treat it like the washing machine, somebody elses problem :dh:

 

How does she manage that? I'm envious. If I stopped filling/emptying the dishwasher, doing the washing, putting out the rubbish etc my lot would quite happily clear a narrow walkway through the debris and carry on as normal. My OH is quite at home with complicated technology and is happy to have the computer in bits on the floor but he is strangely freaked when it comes to pressing buttons on any kind of domestic machine. The only thing which might provoke spirited action is a faulty telly.

 

Well, you remember Quentin Crisp? He never, ever cleaned or tidied his bedsit and in the documentary about him, famously declared "The dust doesn't get any worse after the second year."!!!!

 

Latest build up of bottles, not going to shift this lot for her, will just wait to see how many it takes before she moves em herself.

 

Dare I ask .. okay I will ... Over how many days its that ???? :lollol::hehe:

 

We've had dishwashers for as long as I can remember, in fact, when each of our three kids left us to set up home on their own, they all bought dishwashers as an essential "first purchase" domestic appliance. Given the choice between a washing machine or a dishwasher, as either a purchase or have one break down, they as I in the same situation would rather go to the launderette with a load of washing than actually wash up.
Mind you, they were too idle to put their plates in our dishwasher and used to put them in the sink!

Those with them I'm sure would agree, consider that you can't get everything acceptably clean in a washing up bowl.