Yuppie and The Farmer

Discussion in 'The Muppet Show' started by HarryS, Feb 27, 2011.

  1. HarryS

    HarryS Eternally Optimistic Gardener

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    [size=large] A farmer named Bill was overseeing his animals in a remote mountainous pasture in Scotland when suddenly a brand-new 4x4 advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglassesand YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the farmer, "If I tell youexactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"

    Bill looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing animals and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"

    The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

    The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg.

    Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

    Finally, he prints out a full-colour, 150-page report on his hi-tech,miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the farmer and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

    " Well the numbers exactly right, I guess you can take one of my youngsters," says Bill.
    He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the boot of his car.

    Then Bill says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my animal?"

    The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

    "You're a Member of the European Parliament", says Bill.

    "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you
    guess that?"

    "No guessing required." answered the farmer. "You showed up
    here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of pounds worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows,for that matter. This is a flock of sheep......... Now give me back my dog.[/size]
     
  2. Phil A

    Phil A Guest

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  3. m1dnv

    m1dnv Gardener

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    ha ha classic love it to bits!
     
  4. shiney

    shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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