Problems at work

Heya,

I know I haven't posted on here for a long while but will post an update on my project thread later

I have this problem at work, I don't know when it started but its just with this one woman. I work in a children's centre and in the local area there are 3 and this woman is a receptionist, like me, and she started work (as agency, so not a proper council employee) in December 2008 whereas I started a few months previous. At first, things were ok and she actually gave me a lift into workone day when I was having problems with my car, but since then, I don't know what has happened, or if I've said/done anything to upset her, but she just gives me the cold shoulder and if she phones up (as we're based in different centres to each other), she won't speak to me but will ask to be put through to someone else, even if I'm more then capable of doing what she wants.

For a long while now if I produce a poster for one of the parent/toddler sessions we hold, she will try her hardest to get hold of it (I save it onto my computer desktop and not in the shared drive purely because of this) and she will change it, and she won't even tell me she's done it. So at her centre she'll have her 'updated' version and at the other 2 centres will be my version. I thought for a while that the problem was in my head but I've spoken to a few trusted colleagues (not my manager as she can be a bit funny dependant on her mood) and they've noticed things aswell.

My mum thinks this woman is jealous of me as I am good at my work (I'm not blowing my own trumpet but my work isn't rocket science), she's in her 40's and single whereas I'm 23 and very happily married, so I don't know if she's jealous of that or because of the quality of my work. Its as if she's always trying to do better then me.

I don't have the confidence to confront her about it, but would like to know what I've said/done to upset her so much. I don't dislike her as a person but I've developed this problem with her because of the one she has with me (ok, I wouldn't socialise with her outside of work because she is boring but we're not in work to socialise anyway).

I'm only posting about this because as from next week she's going to be based with me at my centre and when she was over here for a few days last month, she spent all her time in the back office and only came to reception to cover my lunch - sometimes it gets busy on reception so some help would be nice but there's this thing between us that just gets in the way.

I don't feel I can talk to my manager about this 'issue' as her and this woman are very fond of each other and today at 4.55pm, she walks into the centre to have a word with our manager, which I don't know if it was about me as we did exchange a few phone calls earlier, just because I emailled a poster to her and she phoned me to say it needed changing, I only asked her what needed doing and if she wanted to make the changes, then to send it back to me.

I don't want to start feeling like I don't want to go into work (I am seriously looking to leave anyway but only because I'm moving from Liverpool to Coventry and that's nothing work related) but I don't want her to feel like she's won or anything as I feel (and the other receptionist with me) like she's just being pathetic.

By the way, she doesn't know I'm looking to move, not because I don't like her but because I'd prefer she doesn't know, I'm just hoping my manager hasn't told her behind my back.

Can anyone offer me any advice, or have any of you been in a similar situation before?

Many thanks,

Jen
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Ignore her, she's the one with the problem, not you. Maintain a professional relationship with her and keep it like that. Sadly, we can't be liked by everyone - accept that she doesn't like you, for whatever reason and just get on with your job.

You go to work to do a job and work, not to socialise or make friends. As you say, you wouldn't socialise with her outside of work, so she's obviously not your sort of person.

And if your manager has told her about your potential move, get down to HR and report it. That's a breach of trust/confidence on the part of your managerand shouldn't go unreported (although judging by your comment about her being difficult to approach when she's in a mood, she's probably a **** manager anyway!).

Good luck

 

Heya,

Thanks for all your replies, they have been great

Just a bit of an update, she is now based at the centre where I work and so far this week she has only been on reception to cover my lunches (which she is very reluctant to do tbh, you can tell by her face). She has tried once telling me how to do my job which I just didn't take and she didn't try again :hehe:

She has spent the last 2 days in the office amending her beloved posters (which she designed so I don't know what she finds to amend all day long...) and yesterday she tried diving for information from me about my personal life (which she knows nothing about) she asked how my interview went down in Coventry (how she knows I went for an interview I'm not too sure but I'm hoping it wasn't from my manager) so I just turned round to her and said it wasn't a job interview.

I know that was wrong to say, but if you saw the look on her fat face then you'd know why I said it - she looked not interested at all but still wanted to know what went on and she hasn't spoken to me much since.

I have my supervision meeting with my manager on Thursday which I'm not particularly worried about (got no issues to raise anyway) but I don't think I want to mention this 'problem' to her, purely on the basis that them two are 'close' (my manager will buy one of those real life magazines and they'll read the stories together...)

So that's where we're up to so far so its not as bad as it could be

Thanks again for everything

Jen
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She sounds like a character from Little Britain...or perhaps The League of Gentlemen!