Do wives ever listen?

I'm on a bit of a diet. Even before my diet, I had no taste whatsoever for milk chocolate. I never have. When I was a kid I wasn't a fan of milk chocolate, and and no point in the 16 years that wife and I have been together have I ever really liked milk chocolate (Milka is the one exception).

I do however like plain/dark chocolate. I have always liked dark chocolate for as far back as I can remember, and certainly for as long as my missus has known me.

Today, on the way home, we needed a few bits so I pulled up outside a shop, and we agreed its pointless us all going in, so wife would go in on her own. Fine. I asked her to get me some dark chocolate while she's in there.

Some time later, she comes out with a couple of bags of shopping, gets in the car, actually says to me that the reason she was so long was because she'd had trouble finding some things but she'd found them in the end. We drive home. Park up, get all the shopping and the kids in, get settled in indoors, for wife to announce "I didn't get you any dark chocolate, but I got you a Yorkie instead".

Thank you my lovely wife, for: 1) Buying me something you know I don't particularly like, 2) Buying me something that's about 200kcals more than I asked for despite knowing I'm trying to lose some weight, and 3) not bothering to tell me until I was settled in for the night, when if she'd only told me sooner, I'd have just walked over to the corner shop before I'd took my coat off.

But, in the wise words of my 5 year old lad, "you know what womans are like".

 

"But, in the wise words of my 5 year old lad, "you know what womans are like".

Like father like son

 

Think I'll stay out of this one

 

The thing is, if there was a bloke who, after 16 years with his missus, still had no idea what his missus liked or disliked, and regularly offered to do stuff that the wife was perfectly willing to do herself but she let him because he offered, and then he got it persistently wrong, that bloke would be labelled a typical bloke. He'd be mocked briefly, but not too much, because there's no point wasting mockery energy on the matter because its perfectly normal, because everyone surely knows that blokes are all incompetent buffoons.

I had a day off work the other day, and as is always the case when I'm off work on a school day, I took my lad to school. As we neared the school, my missus commented that the dad's never really bother, its always the mams. I drew her attention to the fact that I myself am one of the dads, and I was bothering. She replied "oh yes, of and such and such always comes with his dad". She then thought about it for a moment before listing all the other dads. So I drew her attention to the fact that before she'd given it any thought, even in the face of the evidence, she had drawn the conclusion that dads don't actually bother.

Still, in the wise words of my five year old son, "you know what womans are like".

 

That's the way @clueless1, tell 'em like it is.

 

Ummm, does she read this forum?

 

Being she know's you don't like milk chocolate, she only bought it for her self to eat , and your not a lorry driver

 

Remind me, who was it 3 days before Christmas was asking for ideas.

 

Oh regularly comes home with wrong stuff from shop. But he's always willing to go out in rain and cold to get his pregnant wife food and medicine so he's a hero in my book!

 

No response

 

My wife never listens, at times its like banging my head against a brick wall

 

I guess I could turn this about and say my husband never listens to me either.
One thing, I have told him for the past 25 years is. If I am brushing my teeth in the bathroom, I cannot hear what your saying. Guess what, he starts a conversation when I am brushing my teeth in the bathroom. Daaaah.
And either he can't remember or choses not to remember or not listen, but I told him years ago about finding my father dead in bed when I was 21 years old, that is something one should REMEMBER about your wife. So we are at a restaurant eating dinner, having a conversation about renovating houses, and I say to him, my parents used to do that, renovate and then re-sell quickly. He said, Oh was that when you were 9 years old, I say, why 9 years old, he says, when your dad died. dinner ruined.
I swear we would flunk at the newlywed game, he does not hear, nor store stuff about me.

My nephew the other day still remembers that I like 3 ice cubes in my martini, ask my husband please, he will not have a clue.