Gardening wisdom from the internet

Stop me if you've heard this before..


Q: What kind of tree can fit into your hand?
A: A palm tree

Q: Why shouldn't you tell a secret on a farm?
A: Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears!)

Q: What did the nut say when it sneezed?
A: Cashew!

Q: Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?
A: Real rocks are too heavy!


My wife's a water sign. I'm an earth sign.
Together we make mud.
- Rodney Dangerfield

"A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows."
- Doug Larson

"You can lead a horticulture but you can't make her think."
- Dorothy Parker