The Health and Safety Thread

Discussion in 'The Muppet Show' started by Axl, Oct 27, 2011.

  1. Axl

    Axl Gardener

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    • Phil A

      Phil A Guest

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      Good Call:goodpost:

       
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      • Axl

        Axl Gardener

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        Now that's frightening, so lucky.

        Description 27/09/2007

        D/O Franklin Hire Ltd.the premises is currently a demolition site being prepared for new construction development by our client. The dangerous occourerence was the collapse of a section of scaffolding into the adjacent pedestrian precinct, fortunately there were no injuries for damage to any thirdparty property. At the time of the collapse there was no works adjacent to the scaffolding, there were 3 excavators workin on other areas of the site, we also had a banksman and barriers in Station Road where the next section of the building was being demolished. A member of the public informed our banksman that the scaffolding was leaning out and may collapse, he requested that all members of the public stay back and would they prevent anyone from accessing the area, he then came into the site to inform the woking foreman. Before any further action could take place the scaffold folded out with the outside leg bending over the perimeter hoparding and the scaffold dropping down to street level. All site staff immeadiately attended the area, ensured that no one was hurt and secured the area, someone had contacted emergency services and the police attended and assisted in site security. An HSE employee attended site as ded Directors of our company, the client and the scaffolding sub contractor. The incident was fully assessed and openly discussed by all parties and it appears the collapse was due to there being no high level ties to the scaffolding, this was clad with monaflex and it is assumed that with the windy conditions it was blown outwards off the site, the strength of the hoarding held the scaffold and as the pressure built the collapse occoured as previously described.

        Offence Date 27/09/2007
        Total Fine £10,015.00
         
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        • ARMANDII

          ARMANDII Low Flying Administrator Staff Member

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          See what happen's when you don't wear your Safety Boots:D:heehee::heehee::heehee::loll:
           
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          • ClaraLou

            ClaraLou Total Gardener

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              shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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              Health And Safety At The Zoo

              What to do when you are attacked by the animals.







              A bloke starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks. The first is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds.

              As he does this a huge fish jumps out and bites him. To show who is boss, he beats it to death with a spade.

              Realizing his employer won't be best pleased he disposes of the fish by feeding it to the lions, as lions will eat anything.

              Moving on to the second job of clearing out the chimp house, he is attacked by the chimps who pelt him with coconuts.

              He swipes at two chimps with a spade killing them both. What can he do? Feed them to the lions, he says to himself, because lions eat anything. He hurls the corpses into the lion enclosure.

              He moves on to the last job which is to collect honey from the South American Bees. As soon as he starts he is attacked by the bees.

              He grabs the spade and smashes the bees to a pulp. By now he knows what to do and shovels them
              into the lions’ cage because lions eat anything.

              Later that day a new lion arrives at the zoo. He wanders up to another lion and says
              "What's the food like here?"

              The lion says:
              "Absolutely brilliant, today we had Fish and Chimps with Mushy Bees
               
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              • *dim*

                *dim* Head Gardener

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