A Joke Or Two 2023/24

Discussion in 'The Muppet Show' started by wiseowl, Jan 1, 2023.

  1. ChrisIB

    ChrisIB Gardener

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 2022
    Messages:
    63
    Occupation:
    Computer person
    Location:
    Anulian Box
    Ratings:
    +272
    IMG_20240829_154407_edit_5120162705232.jpg IMG_20240829_154123_edit_4939865882645.jpg
     
    • Funny Funny x 3
    • Like Like x 1
    • Fat Controller

      Fat Controller 'Cuddly' Scottish Admin! Staff Member

      Joined:
      May 5, 2012
      Messages:
      27,841
      Gender:
      Male
      Occupation:
      Public Transport
      Location:
      At me 'puter, GCHQ Ashford Office, Middlesex
      Ratings:
      +52,359
      When God created Adam and Eve, He said to them:
      I have two gifts to give you - one is to pee standing up and...
      Adam, very anxious, interrupted him screaming:
      ME..! ME..! I want it, please Lord... please... please... please...
      This would make life a lot easier!
      Eve agreed and said those things didn’t matter to her.
      So God gave Adam the gift.

      Adam was amazed, screaming for joy, running through the Garden of Eden, peeing on every tree.
      He ran along the beach making drawings with his pee in the sand.
      He lit a fire and played fireman..
      God and Eve stared at the mad man with happiness until Eve asked God:
      and... what is the other present?
      And God answered:

      A Brain, Eve... The brain is yours...
      And that my friends, is how it all started.

      [​IMG]
       
      • Funny Funny x 8
      • Like Like x 1
      • Agree Agree x 1
      • Ladybird4

        Ladybird4 I'm a gardener. What's your super-power?

        Joined:
        Mar 13, 2024
        Messages:
        2,513
        Gender:
        Female
        Occupation:
        Retired Teacher
        Location:
        The North West
        Ratings:
        +7,612
        My change.jpg
         
        • Funny Funny x 7
        • Ladybird4

          Ladybird4 I'm a gardener. What's your super-power?

          Joined:
          Mar 13, 2024
          Messages:
          2,513
          Gender:
          Female
          Occupation:
          Retired Teacher
          Location:
          The North West
          Ratings:
          +7,612
          Penshioners.jpg
           
          • Like Like x 4
          • Funny Funny x 3
          • Ladybird4

            Ladybird4 I'm a gardener. What's your super-power?

            Joined:
            Mar 13, 2024
            Messages:
            2,513
            Gender:
            Female
            Occupation:
            Retired Teacher
            Location:
            The North West
            Ratings:
            +7,612
            Valentine.jpg
             
            • Like Like x 2
            • Funny Funny x 1
            • Ladybird4

              Ladybird4 I'm a gardener. What's your super-power?

              Joined:
              Mar 13, 2024
              Messages:
              2,513
              Gender:
              Female
              Occupation:
              Retired Teacher
              Location:
              The North West
              Ratings:
              +7,612
              91e5b091-81a2-4dfb-ac1f-c9e1cdfb1a83.jpg
               
              • Like Like x 1
              • Star gaze Lily

                Star gaze Lily Gardener

                Joined:
                Mar 13, 2024
                Messages:
                235
                Gender:
                Female
                Location:
                West Sussex
                Ratings:
                +662
                IMG-20240907-WA0000.jpg
                Apologies for language
                 
                • Agree Agree x 3
                • Like Like x 2
                • Creative Creative x 1
                • Pete8

                  Pete8 Gardener

                  Joined:
                  Aug 29, 2017
                  Messages:
                  503
                  Gender:
                  Male
                  Occupation:
                  Retired
                  Location:
                  Billericay, Essex
                  Ratings:
                  +1,172
                  [​IMG]
                   
                  • Funny Funny x 4
                  • Like Like x 1
                  • Bluejayway

                    Bluejayway Plantaholic

                    Joined:
                    Mar 13, 2024
                    Messages:
                    670
                    Gender:
                    Female
                    Occupation:
                    Retired
                    Location:
                    Wales
                    Ratings:
                    +2,171
                    I really like that @Star gaze Lily and I wonder if anybody has sent it to their (Labour) MP yet? I'm about to ....:yikes:
                     
                  • Pete8

                    Pete8 Gardener

                    Joined:
                    Aug 29, 2017
                    Messages:
                    503
                    Gender:
                    Male
                    Occupation:
                    Retired
                    Location:
                    Billericay, Essex
                    Ratings:
                    +1,172
                    [​IMG]
                     
                    • Funny Funny x 5
                    • Agree Agree x 2
                    • Like Like x 1
                    • Star gaze Lily

                      Star gaze Lily Gardener

                      Joined:
                      Mar 13, 2024
                      Messages:
                      235
                      Gender:
                      Female
                      Location:
                      West Sussex
                      Ratings:
                      +662
                    • ViewAhead

                      ViewAhead Head Gardener

                      Joined:
                      Mar 14, 2024
                      Messages:
                      1,982
                      Gender:
                      Female
                      Location:
                      South of the South Downs, north of the sea!
                      Ratings:
                      +4,333
                      I would change the last line to something like "then you are perfect PM material, my son".
                       
                      • Like Like x 4
                      • Bluejayway

                        Bluejayway Plantaholic

                        Joined:
                        Mar 13, 2024
                        Messages:
                        670
                        Gender:
                        Female
                        Occupation:
                        Retired
                        Location:
                        Wales
                        Ratings:
                        +2,171
                        I chickened out and removed the last line before sending...:)
                         
                        • Funny Funny x 2
                        • Bluejayway

                          Bluejayway Plantaholic

                          Joined:
                          Mar 13, 2024
                          Messages:
                          670
                          Gender:
                          Female
                          Occupation:
                          Retired
                          Location:
                          Wales
                          Ratings:
                          +2,171
                          Have sent it but removed the last line, she can use her imagination:loll:
                          Sent a different message to her five weeks ago. No reply yet ...:frown:
                           
                          • Agree Agree x 1
                          • Star gaze Lily

                            Star gaze Lily Gardener

                            Joined:
                            Mar 13, 2024
                            Messages:
                            235
                            Gender:
                            Female
                            Location:
                            West Sussex
                            Ratings:
                            +662
                            • Like Like x 1
                            Loading...

                            Share This Page

                            1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
                              By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
                              Dismiss Notice