FAVOURITE ONE LINERS

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by rossco, Mar 25, 2006.

Page 5 of 6
  1. Beefy

    Beefy Gardener

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    If your happy and you know it -CLANK YOUR CHAINS ! :D :D :D
     
    Beefy, Jul 11, 2006
    #61 Quote in Conversation
  2. shiney

    shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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    People who are resting on their laurels are wearing them at the wrong end.
    ---------
    Wealthy people miss one of lifes great thrills - making the last car payment.
    ---------
    There is only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it.
    ---------
    If you and your wife are arguing and you know you are right - apologise immediately.

    --------------------------------------
    shiney
     
    shiney, Jul 11, 2006
    #62 Quote in Conversation
  3. windy miller

    windy miller Gardener

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    Life's too short to stuff a mushroom.
    --------
    If you can't be a good example - be a horrible warning.
    --------
    Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
    --------
    Inside me lives a skinny woman crying to get out; but I can usually shut the b*tch up with biscuits.
    :D :D :D
     
    windy miller, Jul 11, 2006
    #63 Quote in Conversation
  4. Beefy

    Beefy Gardener

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    Its not P-M-S its Y O U

    I dont beleive in miracles -I rely on them.

    If at first you dont suceed-redefine sucess.

    Dont make up your mind untill you have one

    One tequllia ,two tequilla,three keteela, floor. :D :D

    Pain is inevitable - suffering is optional. :eek:
     
    Beefy, Jul 11, 2006
    #64 Quote in Conversation
  5. shiney

    shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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    The secret of success is start from scratch - and keep scratching.

    Criticising anothers garden doesn't keep the weeds out of your own.

    You're like a teabag - not worth much until you've been through some hot water.

    Laughter has no foreign accent.

    -----------
    shiney
     
    shiney, Jul 12, 2006
    #65 Quote in Conversation
  6. elainefiz

    elainefiz Gardener

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    i love the last one shiney [​IMG]
     
    elainefiz, Jul 12, 2006
    #66 Quote in Conversation
  7. shiney

    shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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    Thanks elainefiz
    Here are a few different types of sentiment.
    -----------

    Always be a little kinder than necessary.

    I have enough money to last me the rest of my life - unless I buy something.

    A politician is a man who will double cross that bridge when he comes to it.

    Don't be humble; you are not that great.

    -----------------------
    shiney
     
    shiney, Jul 12, 2006
    #67 Quote in Conversation
  8. Marley Farley

    Marley Farley Affable Admin! Staff Member

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    [​IMG] It's a poor sort of memory that only works backward...... ;)
    Everything's got a moral, if only you can find it.... :D
     
    Marley Farley, Jul 12, 2006
    #68 Quote in Conversation
  9. windy miller

    windy miller Gardener

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    When stopped for speeding the cop said
    "Good evening, Wing Commander; having trouble taking off are we?" :D :D True.
     
    windy miller, Jul 13, 2006
    #69 Quote in Conversation
  10. marge

    marge Gardener

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    I saw this in the back window of a car (sorry guys)
    GROW YOUR OWN DOPE....PLANT A MAN [​IMG]
     
    marge, Jul 13, 2006
    #70 Quote in Conversation
  11. Liz

    Liz Gardener

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    :D :D :D
     
    Liz, Jul 13, 2006
    #71 Quote in Conversation
  12. Honey Bee

    Honey Bee Gardener

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    :D :D :D :D
     
    Honey Bee, Jul 13, 2006
    #72 Quote in Conversation
  13. roders

    roders Total Gardener

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    Growing old is like being increasingly penalised for a crime you havn't commited........ :D :D
     
    roders, Jul 14, 2006
    #73 Quote in Conversation
  14. shiney

    shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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    That's a good one roders, but it's too close to the truth!!!
    ----------
    shiney
     
    shiney, Jul 15, 2006
    #74 Quote in Conversation
  15. strongylodon

    strongylodon Old Member

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    Get your own back ... Live long enough to be a worry to your children :D
     
    strongylodon, Jul 15, 2006
    #75 Quote in Conversation
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