Gardening Humour

Defenetely :confused:

 

A psychiatrist and his patient were walking through the hospital garden. The patient says: "That rhubarb over there, how do you get it to grow so tall?" The psychiatrist replies: "I think the head gardener puts manure on it". The patient says: "That's a bit strange, we put custard on ours!". :D

 

if it doesn`t stick in your throat,it won`t stick in your a*s*. :D

 

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What have you got to say about that then Dendy, and you thought I was bad enough with that cat pic? :D :D

 

The definition of virtue is - insufficient temptation :D

(I liked your cat DAG)

 

What's the differnce between a constipated marksman and a constipated owl?
One shoots and can't hit straight, the other hoots and can't **** straight. :D :D

 

:D :D

There's no getting away from that subject is there?

jjordie, would you like to see another pic of that cat then?

 

Mrs DAG just walked into the room and said quite seriously;

"Did you know, an octopuses testicles are in it's head?"

Now there's an opener for conversation! :D

 

:D Tend to think along those lines myself quite a bit :D

 

An older lady was determined to show her son that she was able to learn how to use a computer so that she was able to send emails.


When at last she succeeded in typing out her email she did a copy of it and very proudly put it in an envelope and posted it to her son! :D

(This story does not apply to you and me Rosietu)

 

The 'Grand Designs' team were filming a feature at Mick Jaggers sheep farm when one of the flock started to get amorous with the shows presenter; At this the owner broke into song; ' Hey, ewe, get off of McLeod ! '

 

what do you do when you need a wee at allotments?im for ever backwards and forwards from there to home(its only 5 minuites walk but it means wellies off and on every time and i always feel guilty about leaving my little dog)any way,today i thought,knickers to it.im gonna have a wee in a bucket in the hen house.it does have a small shed attatched and it only has a small window.i didnt get caught,i made sure no-one either side of plot there.i thought id gotton away with it till i went back to GH and started itching.never gave the hens and her flees a thought. :eek:

 

:D :D :D Hope you haven't put the hens off laying!!

 

Hope you didn't waste it elainefiz, surely you put it on the compost heap? :D

You did exactly what builders do all the time, when they have no access to a toilet on the site - so I was told by a builder!

 

Always keep an old putty tub in the van myself :D ...with a sealed lid ,of course!

[ 01. May 2006, 07:36 PM: Message edited by: Paladin ]