Guess what I am knitting?

Something for a new or expected baby.

 

Wasn't much choice in them days, it was either that or sackcloth.

 

No, nowhere near.
Do not think I will make the little t...s.

 

are you knitting a garden ? leaving out trees

 

Turnips?

 

Now, the turnip, that's an interesting pattern.

Clue: something for the end of the year.

 

My mate Paul the Neandertal has a balaclava to keep his face warm when he's out on his pushbike. He wore it once against my advice when we went down town boozing. Paul's great. He's the only person I've ever known that manages to completely confuse and terrify burly door staff. It was funny to see them all look at each other each hoping that one of the others would step forward to tell Paul he's "not coming in with that on". Paul is a gentle giant and wouldn't harm or intentionally worry anyone, but he's not that bright and completely doesn't realise that his sheer mass combined with his eccentric ways sometimes cause people to find themselves outside of their comfort zone.

 

Paul, the Neandethal, should have adopted my Ozzy - not only do they sound very similar in description, but, at least they would be company for one another amongst the "wide berth" squads

 

A grim reaper outfit with crocheted lurex scythe.

 

Ooh, I can only crochet doilies.

In fact, It was going to be Christmas pudding tree decorations, but have found I do not have any dark brown wool for the pudding.

Well, I have started something else, using grey wool, so what do you think I am creating?

 

Hmm, no brown eh? Plenty of grey...

It can only be one thing. A battle ship?

http://www.royalnavy.mod.uk/The-Fleet/Ships/Assault-Ships/HMS-Illustrious

 

A wolf?

 

An alternate reality?

 

A sky cosy?