Todays Joke Thread....

man in bedroom shouts down to wife... quick come up here and look at my clock,, she runs upstairs and he is lying naked on the bed with a massive erection..she says that isnt a clock... he says it will be when you put two hands and a face on it

 

A guy goes into a pub for a pint on his way home from work,while at the bar he overhears an old couple talking Ey ciril do you fancy going round the back for a quicky up against that fence like we did in the old days?Ciril perks up and says ay why not.The guy at the bar cant believe what hes hearing they must be knocking on 90 he thinks to himself.the guy decides to go outside to make sure the couple are safe and sound and cant believe what he sees the old man is rattling his missus up the fence like a jack rabbit,this goes on for half an hour and the couple slump to the ground in a big heap.The guy rushes over and picks them both up and says to the old guy jesus man whats your secret i was watching you for half an hour.The old guy says yes son 35 years ago that wasnt an electric fence!!!!!!!!

 

very good inter :D :D

 

catch you all sunday up at six in morn pub open at 7 .. off to watch my beloved man city at birmingham .. watchin city away from home is always a joke :D

 

What's happened today, is it national joke day?

Whatever the reason, :D Sooo funny.

cheers

 

Cmon City!!..

 

not joke week just thought i would get the weekend off to a bang

 

Well you certainly did gecko.

cheers

 

It's always nice to have a bang at the beginning of the weekend :D

 

Some absolute classics :D :D

 

Taken from another forum:

as you may know wacko jackos old house and park is gone and hes thinking of moving to devon of all places
well he has put in for planning permission for a park at his new home , its going to be a Disneyland/jerrasic park type place and he promises every kid who goes there will go home with a dinosaur , well i think thats what he said !
btw whats a "megasorearse" i dont seem to be able to find one on my ladybird book of dinosaurs

 

An old couple are sitting in a church when the woman wispers to the man ive done a silent trump shall we leave now?

The husband says too late love you need to turn the sodding hearing aid up.

 

:D

cheers

 

Let's all be very quiet inter's Man City were spanked 3-1 today...