Wolf whistling

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by Val.., Mar 9, 2012.

  1. music

    music Memories Are Made Of This.

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    Gemini, What if I was Whistling and Singing,'Hungry Like The Wolf' ?, would that Constitute a Trip to San Quentin!!.:WINK1:.
     
  2. clueless1

    clueless1 member... yep, that's what I am:)

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    I think its a sad thing when 1) A compliment is taken as an insult and 2) Governments feel it necessary to intervene in people's lives to such an extent that they they must pass laws banning public expressions of compliment.

    As an aside, a feminist woman (should that be person? her gender is of course no concern of mine) very vocally disapproved of the fact that I was so arrogant as to hold the door for her as we entered the building where we both worked. I'd gone through, and just as had been drummed into me as a child, I did a quick check over my shoulder before letting the door go, so as to ensure it didn't slam in anybody's face. Somebody was behind, so I held the door. After her very vocal disapproval there was only one logical course of action as I passed through the next door. I let my self through, and then simply let the door go. I didn't bother to check if she managed to put her hands up in time to catch the heavy door as it swung shut.
     
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    • Phil A

      Phil A Guest

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      You are more tolerant of rudeness than I am Dave.
       
    • watergarden

      watergarden have left the forum because...i'm a sad case

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      Similar has been going on for years, its just not been that well publicised.
      I recall reading in a newspaper many years ago, this English bloke on his hols in California nearly got arrested because he was not wearing a shirt, it was said that as women are not allowed to be topless, neither can men. I think he was walking from the beach area.
      That said some folk should cover up, like this lady I saw today, I wished I hadn't seen.
       
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      • clueless1

        clueless1 member... yep, that's what I am:)

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        This reminds me of a TV ad I once saw on, I think, Tarrant on TV. It featured two lads on a beach in America, drooling over a very attractive lady coming out of the sea. One says to the other something like 'you know in Europe the ladies can go topless at the beach'. Then it cuts to an entirely different beach where two lads are sunbathing. A, shall we say, slightly less aethetically pleasing lady emerges from the sea, topless, causing the two blokes to cringe. The subtitles say something like 'You know in America at least they make them wear bikini tops'.:)
         
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        • Jack McHammocklashing

          Jack McHammocklashing Sludgemariner

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          It started with a Cyst, never thought it would come to this Hunch back of Notre-Dame

          Or Hot Chocolate :-)

          Jack McH
           
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          • shiney

            shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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            I had this happen to me as I was entering M & S one day. Everyone around us stopped and looked so I replied (looking her up and down) "Oh! You're a woman!! I didn't notice" (in a sarcastic tone). Giggles from all round us as she marched off :heehee:
             
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            • shiney

              shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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              No problem for me as I can't wolf whistle - but I've got a number of leers I'm quite proficient in :heehee: . Can't get arrested for that as I would claim I had wind :loll:
               
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              • ClaraLou

                ClaraLou Total Gardener

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                Years ago a girl wrote into a radio station saying that she had just walked past a particularly rowdy group of builders. After they had completed a chorus of wolf whistles and issued a volley of saucy remarks about her vital statistics, they noticed that she was carrying a cat basket containing a kitten. One of the builders then shouted: 'I wish I woz that kitten, darlin'.' 'So do I', she replied. 'I'm taking him to be neutered.'
                 
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                • Madahhlia

                  Madahhlia Total Gardener

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                  It might not be a compliment, it might be harrassment. It might not be a pleasure to be on the receiving end, it might feel like it was an invasion of privacy, especially if a woman had to face a barrage of this as she walked down the road. When I walk down the street I just want to be myself, not be sexualised by the unwanted attentions of some complete stranger.

                  A true compliment would be delivered in a personal, private and appropriate fashion, no?

                  Honestly, I thought we went through all of this back in the 70s.

                  But then, it's all individual and a lot depends on context. Maybe it's fine if you're up for flirting, but what if you're not?
                   
                • Phil A

                  Phil A Guest

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                  I'm always flattered by the compliments I get on Gardeners Corner:dancy:

                  You lot are the best & i'd never take it the wrong way even from *Dim*:dbgrtmb:
                   
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                  • merleworld

                    merleworld Total Gardener

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                    I remember that ad Clueless :snork:

                    Chance'd be a fine thing, it's many years since I've been wolf whistled :cry3: :loll:

                    I believe in equality but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate old fashioned manners, which are sadly lacking in some of today's youth. At work I often find that men hold the door for you, but they are usually the 40+ ones. I think it depends how they were brought up.
                     
                  • shiney

                    shiney President, Grumpy Old Men's Club Staff Member

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                    Apologies for being serious for just a moment. I don't wish this to extend into a serious discussion but I am just reporting what actually happened at work.

                    The PCness, or not, of wolf whistling (and other appreciations/insults and degrees inbetween) was discussed many times by the girls at work in the 70's and 80's. (I use the term 'girls' because that is what they declared was their preferred term for them as a group.)

                    The conclusion they came to was that, in general, they much preferred to have compliments of whatever form (including wolf whistles) as long as the context was right. Being whistled at whilst walking past a building site during the day, with other members of the public around, was entirely acceptable in their eyes. Whereas, it happening whilst walking past a group of men standing outside a pub at night could be frightening (depending on location and how busy the area was). They agreed that this made it difficult for men to know when was appropriate or not.

                    They did say that the impersonal appreciation of a wolf whistle was preferred to a single male (stranger) approaching them and handing them a long stemmed rose!

                    They were concerned that because of the strongly highlighted publicity of 'harrassment at work' they wished to get their attitude across. They had many in-depth discussions about PC and perceived harrassment and went so far as to put a notice on the staff notice board explaining their attitude. It explained that compliments of all sort were acceptable by other members of staff as long as they were not too personal (they gave some examples). Rude, sexist etc jokes were also acceptable in their presence. The notice ended up with "We are a group of friends, working closely together, and wish to continue in the happy environment that our group has enjoyed for many years".

                    They had all signed it and, subsequently, were all interviewed individually to see whether they had signed willingly. This may not have constituted any form of legal agreement but certainly got their point across.

                    As I stated above, I don't wish to extend this discussion but it is the only time I have heard a female point of view put directly.
                     
                  • clueless1

                    clueless1 member... yep, that's what I am:)

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                    Just to throw one controversial point into the mix, I must point out that this isn't all one sided. In pubs and clubs it is not unusual for a woman to randomly grab some bloke's butt and give it a squeeze (yep, happened to me many times when I was in my prime, and I'm not the only one). Now that is clearly a compliment, but it is not exactly appropriate, and unlike a wolf whistle which is a harmless gesture from afar, it is not something that can be completely ignored if the recipient so chooses.

                    I hear what you all say, women grabbing you in clubs and pubs, sounds great. Sometimes yes. Sometimes the woman is a battle hardened nicotine stained hag. Oh, and try carrying four pints of beer back from the bar without spilling any when a group of obnoxious ladies from the notorious factory up the road start grabbing at you as you go past.
                     
                  • Madahhlia

                    Madahhlia Total Gardener

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                    How would you know if the gesture was harmless unless you asked each individual? I think most women would find facing a barrage of whistles embarrassing and intrusive, just as you would find having your bum squeezed in a pub. As a well-meaning person, is that the effect you'd want to have?

                    As you point out, it's not really great, and it's inappropriate behaviour, no matter what the sex or attractiveness rating of the person doing it.

                    That's what these women wanted, so that's absolutely fine. But random approaches on the street can't be justified in the same way.
                    Best stick to safe, polite and universally acceptable forms of behaviour, then. Most of us can manage that most of the time without considering it too much of an infringement on our personal liberty.

                    I'm not bothered about having doors opened - it's what polite people do for each other, and I'm just as likely to do it for a man as a man is for me.
                     
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